It was quite a weird and somewhat creepy time. As usual I was excited to have to meet up with Alicia (that amazing life coach of mine – remember her?). I had unfortunately missed two of our previous engagements so I was super excited that I could finally have some hour and a half plus to chat and share what has been happening with my life. After the usual chit chat and catch and centering, we moved onto my new exploration – the inner critic. Well, I had never anticipated I would have a monologue with someone listening in – creepy right? Yes indeed, for me it was but I braved it and was consoled by knowing that it was for the better reason of enhancing my life journey hence I was happy to oblige. I never regretted the awkwardness, weirdness and all sorts of –nesses that came with that session. So what did I pick from there.
First and foremost, defining my inner critic. A friend of mine always says I have a very strong inner critic that I should never listen to and do the exact opposite of whatever she says. He was right. I learnt that my inner critic is actually institutional and indeed strong. I understood that this inner critic has been shaped by years of indoctrination around the Christian faith and that there are so many contradictions that have arisen from her trying to assert her voice and control my life. AHA! Guess what, she has just been weakened by this discovery and now whatever happens, I am growing to be constantly and consciously on top of my game. Exciting journey again…
Understanding that I can chart my own life path and not listen to that inner negative voice that critics everything I have to do has been so empowering. Telling her that “hey, stop I have got this figured out!” has started one of the most amazing journeys of all time. I enjoy being able to stop and listen to this voice and understand that I own what I have to do and can chose to do it without permitting my inner critic to wreck havoc on my life. It is difficult as sometimes I will slip back into that space I am used to but I guess realizing that I have slipped and have to get up and go is the most beautiful path to follow.
The journey has not been completed but the beauty of understanding that it is possible to take her, that inner critic and not cooperate with her is a great space to be in. I am excited at what life has offered and given as I explore this journey. I believe the very best is still to come and continue to live life and make sure that I can do this at all costs. Let us be aware of our inner journey and do whatever it is to handle our business well so that we do not relinquish our power to the inner critic but actually stand up to this form of bullying as we live our lives to the very best….Enjoy life and push boundaries, after all we live but only once!